a favorite with the master, Dr. Walker; and through life he retained so great a predilection for t'e place, that on his annual visit to London, he made it a custom to walk through the scene of his boyhood. To most men, every year would render a pilgrimage of this kind more painful than the last; but Wesley seems never to have looked back with melancholy upon the days that were gone; earthly regrets of this kind could find no room in one who was continually pressing onward to the goal." When he had attained his seventeenth year, he was elected to Christ Church, Oxford, "where he pursued his studies with great advantage, I believe under the direction of Dr. Wigan, a gentleman eminent for his classical knowledge. Mr. Wesley's natural temper in his youth was gay and sprightly, with a turn for wit and humor.When he was about twenty-one years of age, "he appeared," as Mr. Badcock has observed, "the very sensible and acute collegian; a young fellow of the finest classical taste, of the most liberal and manly sentiments."+ His perfect knowledge of the clas*sics gave a smooth polish to his wit, and an air of superior elegance to all his compositions. He had already begun to amuse himself occasionally with writing verses, though most of his poetical pieces, at this period, were, I believe, either imitations or translations of the Latin. Some time in this year, however, he wrote an imitation of the sixty-fifth Psalm, which he sent to his father, who says, "I like your verses on the sixty-fifth Psalm; and would not have you bury your talent."‡ Some time after this, when purposing to take deacon's orders, he was roused from the religious carelessness into which he had fallen at college, and amplied himself diligently to the reading of divinity. This more thoughtful frame appears to have been indicated in his letters to his mother, with whom he kept up a regular correspondence; for she replies, "The alteration of your temper has occasioned me much speculation. I, who am apt to be sanguine, hope it may proceed from the opera ions of God's Holy Spirit, that, by taking off your relish for earthly enjoyments, he may prepare and dispose your mind for a more serious and close application to things of a more sublime and spiritual nature. If it be so, happy are you if you cherish those dispositions; and now, in good carnest, resolve to make religion the business of your life; for, after all, that is the one thing which, strictly speaking, is necessary: all things beside are comparatively little to the purposes of life. I heartily wish you would now enter upon a strict examination of yourself, that you may know, whether you have a reasonable hope of salvation by Jesus Christ. If you have, the satisfaction of knowing it will abundantly reward your pains; if you have not, you will find a more reasonable occasion for tears than can be met with in a tragedy. This matter deserves great consideration by all, but especially by those designed for the ministry; who ought, above all things, to make their own calling and election sure; lest, after they have preached to others, they themselves should be cast away." This excellent advice was not lost upon him; and indeed his mother's admirable letters were among the principal means, under God, of producing that still more decided change in his views which soon afterwards began to display itself. He was now about twenty-two years of age. The practical books most read by him at this period, which was probably employed as a course of preparation for holy orders, were, "The Christian's Pattern," by Thomas a Kempis; and Bishop Tay lor's "Rules of Holy Living and Dying;" and his correspondence with his parents respecting these authors shows how carefully he was weighing their inerite, and investigating their meaning, as regarding them in the light of spiritual instructers. The letters of his mother on the points offered to her consideration by her son, show, in many respects, a deeply thinking and discriminating mind; but they are also in proof that both she and her husband had given up their acquaintance, if they ever had any, with works which might have been recommended as much more suitable to the state of their son's mind, and far superior as a directory to true Christianity. This to him would have been infinitely more important than discussing the peculiar views, and adjusting the proportion of excellency and defect, which may be found in such a writer as Kempis, whose "Christian's Pattern" is, where in reality excellent, a manual rather for him who is a Christian already, than for him who is seeking to become one. A few things are however to be remarked in this correspondence which are of considerable interest, as showing the bearings of Mr. Wesley's views as to those truths of which he afterwards obtained a satisfactory conviction, and then so clearly stated and defended. The son, in writing to his mother on Bishop Taylor's book, states several particulars which Bishop Taylor makes necessary parts of humility and repentance; one of which, in reference to humility, "we must be sure, in some sense or other, to think ourselves the worst in every company where we come." And in treating of repentance he says, "Whether God has forgiven us, or no, we know not; therefore be sorrowful for ever having sinned." "I take the more notice of this last sentence," says Mr. Wesley, "because it seems to contradict his own words in the next section, where he says, that by the Lord's supper all the members are united to one another, and to Christ the head. The Holy Ghost confers on us the graces necessary for, and our souls receive the seeds of, an immortal nature. Now, surely these graces are not of so little force as that we cannot perceive whether we have them, or not: if we dwell in Christ, and Christ in us, which he will not do unless we are regenerate, certainly we must be sensible of it. If we can never have any certainty of our being in a state of salvation, good reason it is that every moment should be spent, not in joy, but in fear and trembling; and then undoubtedly, in this life, we are of all men most miserable. God deliver us from such a fearful expectation as this! Humility is, undoubtedly, necessary to salvation; and if all these things are essential to humility, who can be humble? who can be saved ?" The mother, in reply, suggests to him some good thoughts and useful distinctions on the subject of humility; but omits to afford him any assistance on the point of the possibility of obtaining a comfortable persuasion of being in a state of salvation, through the influence of the Holy Spirit; which he already discerned to be the privilege of a real believer, though as yet he was greatly perplexed as to the means of obtaining it. At this period too he makes the important distinction between assurance of present, and assurance of future, salvation; by confounding which, so many, from their objection to the Calvinistic notion of the infallible perseverance of the saints, have given up the doctrine of assurance altogether. "That we can never be so certain of the pardon of our sins, as to be assured they will never rise up against us, I firmly believe. We know that they will infallibly do so if ever we apostatize; and I am not satisfied what evidence there can be of our final perseverance, till we have finished our course. But I am persuaded we may know if we are now in a state of salvation, since that is expressly promised in the Holy Scriptures to our sincere endeavors; and we are surely able to judge of our own sincerity." The latter part of this extract will, however, show how much he had yet to learn as to "the way to the Father." Mrs. Wesley also corres a defective definition of faith, which her son' letter had contained, in the following sensible remarks; which are just, as far as they go, but below the true scriptural standard, and the proper conception of that saving faith after which her son was inquiring; "You are somewhat mistaken in your notions of faith. All faith is an assent, but all assent is not faith. Some truths are self-evident, and we assent to them because they are so. Others, after a regular and formal process of reason by way of deduction from some self-evident principle, gain our assent. This is not properly faith, but science. Some again we assent to, not because they are self-evident, or because we have attained the knowledge of them in a regular method by a train of arguments, but because they have been revealed to us, either by God or man; and these are the proper objects of faith. The true measure of faith is the authority of the reveal er; the weight of which always holds proportion to our conviction of his ability and integrity. Divine faith is an assent to whatever God has revealed to us, because he has revealed it." Predestination was another subject touched upon in this interesting correspondence. Mr. Wesley was probably led to it by his review of the articles of the church previous to his ordination; and he thus expresses himself on this controverted subject: "What then shall I say of predestination? An everlasting purpose of God to deliver some from damnation, does, I suppose, exclude all from that deliverance who are not chosen. And if it was inevitably decreed from eternity, that such a determinate part of mankind should be saved, and none beside them, a vast majority of the world were only born to eternal death, without so much as a possibility of avoiding it How is this consistent with either the divine justice or mercy? Is it merciful to ordain a creature to everlasting misery? Is it just to punish a man for crimes which he could not but commit? That God should be the author of sin and injustice, which must, I think, be the consequence of maintaining this opinion, is a contradiction to the clearest ideas we have of the divine nature and perfections." * From these views he never departed; and the terms he uses contain indeed the only rational statement of the whole question. He was ordained deacon in September, 1725, and the year following was elected fellow of Lincoln college. His previous seriousness had been the subject of much banter and ridicule, and appears to have been urged against him, in the election, by his opponents; but his reputation for learning and diligence, and the excellence of his character, triumphed; and, what was probably to him the greatest pleasure, he had the gratification of seeing the joy this event gave to his venerable parents, and which was emphatically expressed in their letters. Several specimens of his poetry, composed about this time, are given by his biographers, which show that, had he cultivated that department of literature, he would not have occupied an inferior place among the tasteful and elegant votaries of verse; but he took that opportunity of conversing with them at large upon those serious topics which then fully occupied his mind. In September, he returned to Oxford, and resumed his usual studies. "His literary character was now established in the university; he was acknowledged by all parties to be a man of talents, and an excellent critic in the learned languages. His compositions were distinguished by an elegant simplicity of style, and justness of thought, that strongly marked the excellence of his classical taste. His skill in logic, or the art of reasoning, was universally known and admired. The high opinion that was entertained of him in these respects was soon publicly expressed, by choosing him Greek lecturer, and moderator of the classes, on the seventh of November; though he had only been elected fellow of the college in March, was little more than twenty-three years of age, and had not proceeded master of arts." He took this degree in February, 1727; became his father's curate in August the same year; returned to Oxford in 1728, to obtain priest's orders; and paid another visit to Oxford in 1729; where during his stay, he attended the meetings of a small society formed by his brother Charles, Mr. Morgan, and a few others, to assist each other in their studies, and to consult how to employ their time to the best advantage. After about a month, he returned to Epworth; but upon Dr. Morley, the rector of his college, requiring his residence, he quitted his father's curacy, and in November again settled in Oxford. He now obtained pupils, and became tutor in the college; presided as moderator in the disputations six times a-week; and had the chief direction of a religious society. From this time he stood more prominently forward in his religious character, and in efforts to do good to others; and began more fully to prove that "they that will live godly in Christ Jesus must suffer persecution." It is however necessary to turn to the history of Mr. Charles Wesley, whose labors in the early periods of Methodism were inferior only to those of his brother. Charles Wesley was, as above stated, five years younger than his brother John; and was educated at Westminster school, under his eldest brother, Samuel, from whom he is said to have derived a still stronger tincture of high church principles than was imbibed under the paternal roof. "When he had been some years at school, Mr. R. Wesley, a gentleman of large fortune in Ireland, wrote to his father, and asked if he had any son named Charles; if so, he would make him his heir. Accordingly, a gentleman in London brought money for his education several years. But one year another gentleman called, probably Mr. Wesley himself, talked largely with him, and asked if he was willing to go with him to Ireland. Mr. Charles desired to write to his father, who answered immediately, and referred it to his own choice. He chose to stay in England." + "Mr. John Wesley, in his account of his brother, calls this a fair escape. The fact is more remarkable than he was aware of; for the person who inherited the property intended for Charles Wesley, and who took the name of Wesley, or Wellesley, in consequence, was the first earl of Mornington, grandfather of Marquis Wellesley and the duke of Wellington."‡ The lively disposition of Charles, although he pursued his studies diligently, and was unblameable in his conduct, repelled all those exhortations to a more strictly religious course, which John seChrist's Church. During his brother's absence, as soon found more serious and more useful employ-riously urged upon him, after he was elected to mentioned as one of the minor sects in conjunction a real with a relative change, or he regarded sancwith the Anabaptists; for, as early as 1639, in a sermon tification as a preparation for, and a condition of pupils, was more strict than the university had been | Πολλή μοι καύχησις ὑπὲρ ὑμων· πεπλήρωμαι τη παρακλήσει accustomed to witness; and for this reason, that it ὑπευπερισσεύομαι τη χαραι.* What would you be? was more deeply and comprehensively conscien- Would you be angels? I question whether a mortal ment. He spent the summer after his election to the fellowship, with his parents, in Lincolnshire, and • Whitehead's Life. * Whitehead's Life. + Whitehead's Life, vol. i p. 96. : Southey's Life. his father's curate, his letters, however, became more grave; and when Mr. John Wesley returned to Oxford, in November, 1729, "I found him," he observes, "in great earnestness to save his soul." His own account of himself is, that he lost his first year at college in diversions; that the next, he set himself to study; that diligence led him into serious thinking; that he went to the weekly sacrament, persuading two or three students to accompany him; and that he observed the method of study prescribed by the statutes of the university. "This," says he, "gained me the harmless name of Methodist." Thus it appears that Charles was the first modern Methodist, and that he in fact laid the foundations of the religious society which continues to be distinguished by that appellation. To this society Mr. John Wesley joined himself on his return to reside at Oxford; and by his influence and energy gave additional vigor to their exertions, to promote their own spiritual improvement, and the good of others. The union of system and efficiency which this association presented, well accorded with his practical and governing mind; and, no doubt, under the leadings of a superior agency, of which he was unconscious, he was thus training himself to those habits of regular and influential exertion and enterprize which subsequently rendered him the instrument of a revival of religion throughout the land. Of the little society which, by the mere force of his character, he thus became the head, Mr. Hervey, the author of the "Meditations," and the celebrated Whitefield, were members. CHAPTER II. THE strictly religious profession which Mr. Wesley must now be considered as making at Oxford-a profession so strongly marked as to become matter of public notice, and accompanied with so much zeal as to excite both ridicule and opposition, requires to be carefully examined. After all, he thought himself to be but "almost," and not "altogether," a Christian-a conclusion of a very perplexing kind to many who have set up themselves for better judges in his case than he himself. From a similar cause, we have seen St. * From the name of an ancient sect of physicians, say some of Mr. Wesley's biographers; but probably the wits of Oxford, who imposed the name, knew nothing of that sect of the middle ages. The non-conformists were often called in derision, Methodists; and the name was probably transmitted from them; or it might be given merely from the rigid adherence to me thod in study by Mr. Charles Wesley. It is, however, somewhat worthy of notice, before the of non-conformity, properly so called, we find Methodists Paul all but reproved by some divines, for representing himself "as the chief of sinners," at the time when he was "blameless" as to "the righteousness of the law;" and, but for the courtesy due to an inspired man, he would, probably, in direct contradiction to his own words, have been pronounced the chief of saints; although. his heart remained a total stranger to humility and charity. The Wesleys at Oxford were indeed not only in a higher, but in an essentially different state of religious experience from that of Saul of Tarsus, notwithstanding his array of legal zeal and external virtue; but if our views of personal religion must be taken from the New Testament, although as to men they were blameless and exemplary, yet, in respect to God, those internal changes had not taken place in them, which it is the office of real Christianity to effect. They were, however, most sincere; they were "faithful in that which is little," and God gave them "the true riches." They "sought God with all their heart;" and they ultimately found him, but in a way which at that time "they knew not." The very writers, Bishop Taylor, and Mr. Law, who so powerfully wrought upon their consciences, were among the most erring guides to that "peace of God which passeth all understanding," for which they sighed; and those celebrated divines, excelled by none for genius and eloquence, who could draw the picture of a practical piety so copious and exact in its external manifestations, were unable to teach that mystic connection of the branches with the vine, from which the only fruits which are of healthy growth and genuine flavor can proceed. Both are too defective in their views of faith, and of its object, the atonement of spirit Christ, to be able to direct a penitent and troubled spirit into the way of salvation, and to show how all the principles and acts of truly Christian piety, are sustained by a life of "faith in the Son of God." To this subject, however, Mr. Wesley's own account of himself will, subsequently, again call our attention. Bishop Taylor's chapter on purity of intention, first convinced Mr. Wesley of the necessity of being holy in heart, as well as regular in his outward conduct; and having, for the first time, formed an acquaintance with a religious friend, "he began to alter the whole form of his conversation, and to set in earnest upon a new life." "He communicated every week. He watched against all sin, whether in word or deed, and began to aim at, and pray for, inward holiness;" but still with a painful consciousness that he found not that which he so earnestly sought. His error, at this period, was drawn from his theological guides just mentioned; he either confounded sanctification with justification, that is, preached at Lambeth, they are rated in good set style for their aversion to rhetorical sermons:-"Where are now our Anabaptists, and plain pack-staff Methodists, who esteem all flowers of rhetoric in sermons no better than stinking weeds, and of all elegancies of speech, no better than profane spells?" &c. Their fault in those days, it appears, was to prefer plain preaching; no bad compliment, though an undesigned one. The epithet used to describe them, may also intimate that they were plain in dress and manners. At a later period, 1693, some of the non-conformists, who had renounced the imputation of Christ's righteousness in justification, except in the merit of it, and whose views were somewhat similar to those of the Wesleyan Methodists, on the imputation of faith for righteousness, were called by their brethren, the New Methodists. They were not however a sect, but were vere so denominated from the new method which they took in stating the doctrine of justification. Thus we have a Calvinistic pamphlet, under this date, written against "the principles of the New Methodists in the great point of justification." justification. He had not yet learned the apostle's doctrine, the gratuitous justification of "the ungodly," when penitent, and upon the sole condition of believing in Christ; nor that upon this there follows a "death" unto all inward and outward sin; so that he who is so justified can "ro longer continue therein." It is, however, deeply interesting, to trace the progress of his mind through its agitations, inquiries, hopes, and fears, until the moment when he found that steadfast peace which never afterwards forsook him, but gave serenity to his countenance, and cheerfulness to his heart, to the last hour of a prolonged life. The effects of the strong impression which had been made upon him by the practical writings of Taylor and Law promptly manifested themselves. The discipline he maintained, as a tutor over his • Journal. tious. He regarded himself as responsible to God for exerting himself to his utmost, not only to promote their learning, but to regulate their moral habits, and to form their religious principles. Here his disciplinary habits had their first manifestation. He required them to rise very early; he directed their reading, and controlled their general conduct, by rules to which he exacted entire obedience. This was not well taken by the friends of some; but from others he received very grateful letters; and several of his pupils themselves were not insensible of the obligations they owed to him, not only on a religious account, but for thus enabling them to reap the full advantages of that seat of can arrive to a greater degree of perfection than steadily to do good, and for that very reason patiently and meekly to suffer evil. For my part, on the present view of your actions and designs, my daily prayers are, that God would keep you humble; and then I am sure that if you continue "to suffer for righteousness' sake," though it be but in a lower degree, the Spirit of God and of glory shall in some good measure rest upon you. And you cannot but feel such a satisfaction in your own minds, as you would not part with for all the world. Be never weary of well doing; never look back, for you know the prize and the crown are before you; though I can scarce think so meanly of you, as that you should learning, by restraining them from its dissipations. be discouraged with the "crackling of thorns under The little society of Methodists, as they were a pot." Be not high-minded, but fear. Preserve and diligence in their attempts to do good, exhibit- he seemed at a loss which way to proceed, to obtain ing a rare example of decision, only to be account- the happiness and security he wanted. The deep called, began now to extend its operations. When Mr. Wesley joined them, they committed its management to him, and he has himself stated its original members: "In November, 1729, four young gentlemen of Oxford, Mr. John Wesley, Fellow of Lincoln college; Mr. Charles Wesley, student of Christ's Church; Mr. Morgan, commoner of Christ's Church; and Mr. Kirkman, of Merton college, began to spend some evenings in a week together, in reading chiefly the Greek Testament. The next year, two or three of Mr. John Wesley's pupils desired the liberty of meeting with them; and afterwardsone of Mr. Charles Wesley's pupils. It was in 1732 that Mr. Ingham, of Queen's college, and Mr. Broughton, of Exeter, were added to their number. To these, in April, was joined Mr. Clayton, of Brazennose, with two or three of his pupils. About the same time Mr. James Hervey was permitted to meet with them, and afterwards Mr. Whitefield." Mr. Morgan led the way to their visiting the prisoners in the Oxford jail, for the purpose of affording them religious instruction. They after wards resolved to spend two or three hours a-week in visiting and relieving the poor and the sick, generally, where the parish ministers did not object to it. This was, however, so novel a practice, and might be deemed by some so contrary to church order, that Mr. Wesley consulted his father upon the point. Mr. Wesley, senior, answered the inquiry in a noble letter, equally honorable to his feelings as a father, and a minister of Christ. They had his full sanction for prosecuting their pious labors; he blessed God who had given him two sons together at Oxford, who had received grace and courage to turn the war against the world and the devil; he bids them defy reproach, and animates them in God's name to go on in the path to which their Saviour had directed them. At the same time, he advises them to consult with the chaplain of the prison, and to obtain the approbation of the bishop. This high sanction was obtained; but it was not sufficient to screen them from the rebukes of the gravely lukewarm, or the malignantly vicious. Sarcasm and serious opposition robbed them of one of their number, who had not fortitude to bear the shafts of ridicule, or to resist the persuasion of friends; and the opposition being now headed by some persons of influence, Mr. Wesley had again recourse, by letter, to his father's counsel. The answer deserves to be transcribed at length : "This day I received both yours, and this evening, in the course of our reading, I thought I found an answer, that would be more proper, than any I myself could dictate; though since it will not be easily translated, I send it in the original. • Journal. an equal temper of mind under whatever treatment you meet with, from a not very just or wellnatured world. Bear no more sail than is necessary, but steer steady. The less you value yourselves for these unfashionable duties, (as there is no such thing as works of supererogation,) the more all good and wise men will value you, if they see your works are all of a piece; or, which is infinitely more, He by whom actions and intentions are weighed will both accept, esteem, and reward you. "I hear my son John has the honor of being styled the 'Father of the Holy Club;' if it be so, I am sure I must be the grandfather of it; and I need not say, that I had rather any of my sons should be so dignified and distinguished, than to have the title of His HOLINESS."+ Thus encouraged, they proceeded in their course with meekness and constancy; to relieve the poor, they sacrificed all the superfluities, and sometimes the conveniences of life; and they redoubled their efforts to produce religious impressions upon their college acquaintance, as well as upon the ignorant, the poor, and the sick. The apology for these pious and praiseworthy efforts, which, on the increase of the outcry made against them, Mr. Wesley published in the modest form of queries, amply indicates the low state of religious feeling in the university; and we may well conclude with one of Mr. Weslev's biographers, that "a voluntary scheme of so much private and public good, such piety, with such beneficence, certainly merited a different return; and, if the university, in general, instead of ridiculing or persecuting them, had had the grace to imitate their example, it would have been much better both for the public and themselves." Even their eldest brother Samuel added his seasonable exhortations to perseverance, in a short, but vigorous letter:-" I cannot say, I thought you always, in every thing right; but I must now say, rather than you and Charles should give over your whole course, especially what relates to the castle, I would choose to follow either of you, nay both of you, to your graves. I cannot advise you better, than in the words I proposed for a motto to a pamphlet, Στηθ' ἑδραῖος ὡς ἀκμων τυπτόμενος· καλς γὰρ ἀθλητα δέρεσθαι και νικαν. 'Stand thou steadfast as a beaten anvil; for it is the part of a good champion to be flayed alive and to conquer."‡ Sickness, and cowardly desertion arising from weariness of the cross, some time after this, reduced the number of this little society of zealous young men, and the brothers were left to stand almost alone; but they still persevered with unabated zeal 2 Cor. vii. 4. Great is my glorying of you. I am filled with comfort. I am exceedingly joyful.-Author+ Whitehead's Life. ised version. + Whitehead's Lifo ed for by a preparing influence of God upon their hearts, thus training them up for a still more arduous service. This it was which had implanted in them those admirable principles which are unreservedly laid open in a letter of Mr. John Wesley to his brother Samuel, who had begun to think that they were pushing the strictness of their personal piety too far. "1. As to the end of my being, I lay it down for a rule, that I cannot be too happy, or therefore too holy; and thence infer that the more steadily I keep my eye upon the prize of our high calling, and the more of my thoughts and words and actions are directly pointed at the attainment of it, the better. 2. As to the instituted means of attaining it, I likewise lay it down for a rule, that I am to use them every time I may. 3. As to prudential means, I believe this rule holds of things indifferent in themselves; whatever I know to do me hurt, that to me is not indifferent, but resolutely to be abstained from: whatever I know to do me good, that to me is not indifferent, but resolutely to be embraced." * Adverting to this charge of over strictness, and being "righteous overmuch," he also earnestly requests his mother to point out any instance in which she might judge, from their unreserved communications to her of every part of their conduct, that they were too superstitious or enthusiastic on the one hand, or too remiss on the other. Some anxiety had indeed been created at home by the singularity of their proceedings, and the opposition they had roused at Oxford, which was probably the chief reason why the father extended his journey from London to Oxford at the close of the year 1731. He was, however, evidently satisfied with his personal observations and inquiries; for on his return to London, he writes to Mrs. Wesley, that he had been well repaid for the expense and labor of his journey to Oxford, "by the shining piety of our two sons." In the midst of all this zeal, devotedness, and patience of reproach, when the eye of man could see nothing but a mature and vital Christianity, we are enabled to ascertain the state of Mr. Wesley's own heart, as laid open by himself. Speaking of a time a little subsequent to the decided impressions he had received from the reading of Bishop Taylor's "Holy Living and Dying," and Mr. Law's "Serious Call," he says, "I was convinced more than ever, of the exceeding height and breadth and depth of the law of God. The light flowed in so mightily upon my soul, that every thing appeared in a new view. I cried to God for help, and resolved not to prolong the time of obeying him as I had never done before. And by my continued endeavor to keep his whole law, inward and outward to the best of my power, I was persuaded that I should be accepted of him; and that I was even then in a state of salvation." He was now manifestly seeking justification before God by efforts at a perfect obedience to his law; nor was he then quite hopeless as to success. Some time afterward, still clearly convinced as he had been from the first that he was not in that state of mind, that settled enjoyment of conscious peace with God, that love to him, delight in in him, and filial access to him, which the New Testament describes as the privilege of a true believer, but still diligently persevering in the rigid practice of every discovered duty in the hope of seizing the great prize by this means, he became greatly surprised rised that he far from obtaining it. He was often dull and formal in the use of ordinances, and was on that account thrown "into distress and perplexity; so that • Whitehead's Life. was so tone of feeling, and the earnestness of his inquiries, in the following passages from a letter to his mother, written in 1732, present this state of his mind in a very affecting light. He then needed some one more fully instructed in the true doctrine of salvation, than even this excellent and intelligent "guide of his youth," ," to teach him to lay down the burden of his wounded and anxious spirit, in self-despair as to his own efforts, at the foot of the cross of Christ. After mentioning Mr. Morgan, he observes: "One consideration is enough to make me assent to his and your judgment concerning the holy sacrament; which is, that we cannot allow Christ's human nature to be present in it, without allowing either conor tran-substantiation. But that his divinity is so united to us then, as he never is but to worthy receivers, I firmly believe; though the manner of that union is utterly a mystery to me. "That none but worthy receivers should find this effect is not strange to me, when I observe, how small effect many means of improvement have upon an unprepared mind. Mr. Morgan and my brother were affected, as they ought, by the observations you made on that glorious subject: but though my understanding approved what was excellent, yet my heart did not feel it. Why was this, but because it was pre-engaged by those affections with which wisdom will not dwell? Because the animal mind cannot relish those truths which are spiritually discerned. Yet I have those writings which the good Spirit gave to that end! I have many of those which he hath since assisted his servants to give us; I have retirement to apply these to my own soul daily; I have means both of public and private prayer; and above all, of partaking in that sacrament once a week. What shall I do to make all these blessings effectual? to gain from them that mind which was also in Christ Jesus? "To all who give signs of their not being strangers to it, I propose this question-and why not to you rather than any?-Shall I quite break off my pursuit of all learning, but what immediately tends to practice? I once desired to make a fair show in languages and philosophy; but it is past; there is a more excellent way; and if I cannot attain to any progress in the one, without throwing up all thoughts of the other, why fare it well! yet a little while, and we shall all be equal in knowledge, if we are in virtue. "You say, you have renounced the world. And what have I been doing all this time? What have I done ever since I was born? Why I have been plunging myself into it more and more. It is enough: awake thou that sleepest. Is there not one Lord, one Spirit, one hope of our calling? one way of attaining that hope? Then I am to renounce the world as well as you. That is the very thing I want to do: to draw off my affections from this world, and fix them on a better. But how? What is the surest and the shortest way? Is it not to be humble? Surely this is a large step in the way. But the question recurs, How am I to do this? To own the necessity of it, is not to be humble. In many things you have interceded for me and prevailed. Who knows but in this, too, you may be successful? If you can spare me only that little part of Thursday evening which you formerly bestowed upon me in another manner, I doubt not but it would be as useful now, for correcting my heart, as it was then for forming my judgment. "When I observe how fast life flies away, and how slow improvement comes, I think one can ne • Whitehead. |